Survivors dealing with intimate partner violence face a multitude of barriers when trying to end the relationship and find safety or support. The offender in the relationship often holds a great deal of power and control over the victim and thus limits freedoms and increases isolation from the outside world.
If you have never called a crisis support line, it can seem a little intimidating. Speaking with a stranger about your most intimate and personal issues can be unsettling and make a person feel very vulnerable. However, we want to use this post to give you (or someone you care about) a better understanding of what to expect and hopefully alleviate some fears about reaching out for support.
What Will Happen When I Call?
It is estimated that it may take at least seven attempts for a person to leave an abusive relationship. Reaching out to our crisis support line can be the first step to creating a plan to live a life free of violence.
For some, they may prefer to speak with an advocate via text, for others, it may not be safe to make a phone call. Accessibility is about choices - and survivors who are managing their safety need choices. That is why we have three options to reach crisis support staff.
24/7 Hotline: 301.759.9244 Text: 301.970.4242 Webchat: rc.chat/fcrc
Part Two: Addressing Sexual Assault and Sexual Violence
For part two of our LGBTQIA series, we will be discussing sexual assault and sexual violence in the LGBTQIA community. Sexual violence happens in every demographic and within every community. The rates of sexual violence within the LGBTQIA community are at similar, if not higher rates (Human Rights Campaign HRC, 2020). One study completed by the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Projects (NCAVP), suggests that one in ten LGBTQIA survivors has experienced a sexual assault from their partners. When looking specifically at transgender people and bisexual women, about 50% will experience some form of sexual violence in their lifetime (HRC, 2020).
As with intimate partner violence, LGBTQIA victims/survivors often face stigma, barriers, marginalization, and violence motivated by homophobia, transphobia, and biphobia. Sometimes a sexual assault is used as a form of hate-motivated violence (HRC, 2020). Additionally, society places stereotypes on the LGBTQIA community, such as “this community is hypersexualized”, “they are deviant”, or “their relationships are not serious and won’t last”. Stereotypes, stigma, and discrimination often keep victims/survivors silent and can create an environment of victim blaming or shame surrounding the sexual violence.
Some quick facts from the National Coalition against Domestic Violence (NCADV) and the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence (NRCDV):
What can you do if someone you know has been sexually assaulted?
What can you do if you have been sexually assaulted?
You are not alone. We are here for you.
Some additional resources:
LGBT National Help Center
National Hotline (1-888-843-4564) or National Youth Talkline (1-800-246-7743)
Forge (Serves Transgender and gender non-conforming survivors of domestic and sexual violence)
National Sexual Assault Hotline
A Two Part Series: Addressing IPV and Sexual Violence in the LGBTQIA Community
As LGBTQIA allies and advocates for survivors of intimate partner violence and sexual assault, we wanted to bring to our readers a two-part blog series highlighting the LGBTQIA community. At the national level, awareness about intimate partner violence has traditionally focused on heterosexual norms and relationships. As more research becomes available, society has learned that the LGBTQIA community is affected by intimate partner violence equally, if not more, than heterosexual cis-gendered couples. Intimate partner violence within the LGBTQIA community is vastly underreported, not acknowledged, or reported as something else rather than domestic violence. Due to past trauma and stigma, LGBTQIA survivors are less likely to seek help and resources regarding intimate partner violence.
Power and Control
There are several tactics a perpetrator of abuse may use such as intimidation, emotional abuse, isolation, denying/minimizing/blaming, using children, using privilege, economic abuse, and using coercion/threats (See below image for the Power and Control Wheel, provided by the National Domestic Violence Hotline). When looking at these different forms of power and control for someone of the LGBTQIA community, the use of homophobia, biphobia, and transphobia is prevalent. For example, a perpetrator of abuse may isolate the victim/survivor by saying “No one else will love you because of your sexual orientation/gender identity” or “If you leave me you will never see our children again, because of your sexual orientation/gender identity”. Additionally, in smaller communities (like ours) this can also be a form of control as the perpetrator could use neighbors and other members of the community to keep track of the victim/survivor’s movement or whereabouts.
While the tactics of power and control used by perpetrators of abuse remain comparable to those of heterosexual relationships, some additional and unique forms may be used. One such form of power and control a perpetrator may use is threatening to “out” the victim/survivor’s sexual orientation/gender identity to their workplace, family, friends, or community members (National Resource Center on Domestic Violence NCADV, 2018). Another form of power and control for someone who is transgender is when the abusive partner uses inappropriate pronouns, referring to the victim/survivor as “it” rather than their preferred pronoun (NCADV, 2018). The abusive partner may ridicule the transgender partner’s body or identity or tell the transgender partner that they are not a “real” man or woman (NCADV, 2018).
The LGBTQIA community faces additional barriers regarding intimate partner violence, preventing members to seek services, which include (National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 2020):
What can you do if someone you care about is a victim/survivor of intimate partner violence (The NW Network of Bi, Trans, Lesbian, and Gay Survivors of Abuse, 2013)?
Family Crisis Resource Center, Inc. officially began in 1978 under the name Women’s Refuge, Inc.. as part of the grass roots efforts addressing domestic violence. Women’s Refuge focused on providing assistance to and shelter for women who were unable to or unwilling to remain in the family residence due to intimate partner violence. The Women’s Refuge noticed very quickly a frequent history of sexual victimization among the women they served. A realization also occurred that children of these women had a need for support services, too. Women’s Refuge expanded to provide intervention and supportive counseling for sexual victimization and counseling services for children.
As the years passed and needs of the service population became more apparent, Women’s Refuge continued expanding. A home was purchased to provide a shelter, rather than sheltering women and their children in hotels. Separate office space was rented to provide counseling and advocacy services for women not residing in the shelter but still in need of assistance. Services grew to include individual counseling for child victims of incest, children who witnessed domestic violence, rape survivors, adult survivors of incest, and teen dating violence victims. Secondary victims, friends and family members of victims, also became eligible for supportive services. Because Women’s Refuge expanded services to the whole family and focused on family health, the name was officially changed to Family Crisis Resource Center, Inc. (FCRC).
Realizing a need for intervention programs to support ending violence in the community, the Abuse Intervention Program was implemented as a group program for perpetrators of intimate partner violence. Supervised Visitation was also implemented to provide a safe, secure environment for children to visit non-custodial parents in families experiencing domestic and sexual violence.
In 2000, with Allegany County and City of Cumberland Government support, FCRC built our current location ; a co-located shelter and office to address the increasing demand for services, decrease barriers to accessing these services, and provide more seamless administration. and decreased barriers to accessing services. FCRC also expanded services to include male victims, limited English proficiency survivors, and the LGBTQ population. Efforts were made to incorporate men as allies and inform the community that sexual and intimate partner crimes impact everyone, not just women. FCRC also increased its focus on prevention of intimate partner violence and crimes by expanding community education to include prevention workshops with young people and social media awareness. Around 2010, FCRC’s advocacy and support services, with the exception of the shelter, shifted to outreach. While some supportive services still occur in the building, many of the advocates are at various locations (colleges, schools, YMCA, the library, etc.) in the county bringing services and education to the community.
Increasingly, FCRC is involved in collaborative efforts with other agencies in the area to more effectively address domestic and sexual crimes. FCRC participates in the Sexual Assault Response Team, Allegany County Family Violence Council, Child Abuse Task Force, Multidisciplinary Team, Fatality Review Team, Allegany County Health Planning Coalition, Continuum of Care, and many other collaborative efforts.
Without the strong leadership of the women who began the movement in 1978 and the solid community partnerships, victims and survivors in Allegany County would not have access to the resources provided by FCRC today.
*We would like to acknowledge long time board member Betsey Hurwitz-Schwab for her work in gathering our historical content and guiding this blog post. THANK YOU!
We want to welcome you to the newest addition to our website, the Family Crisis Resource Center, Inc.’s blog.
Since our inception in 1978, we have grown from a small volunteer-led program to a dual focus domestic violence and rape crisis center, offering trauma-informed support and advocacy services for victims and survivors of intimate partner violence, rape, sexual assault, abuse, and incest. Currently, we provide services to survivors in Allegany County, MD and surrounding areas. You’ll be able to learn more about our history in our next post!
This blog is meant to be an instrument of change and awareness for survivors and their allies within our community. In it, we will talk about how to maintain safety; how to support a friend or loved one, and hopefully answer questions that you may have about our services. We also hope that you can learn more about what you can say and do in your everyday life to make our community a safer and more comfortable place for all.
So stay tuned! And keep up-to-date on the latest happenings at FCRC by following us on Facebook.